New development… I have been studying, looking around. I am ready to get somewhere. I am already a personal trainer… now I am adding public speaker and my Life Coaching cert will definitely help in this. I want to thank all of you who have been patient with me… I know it does look like I am not doing anything… obviously that’s not the case. Thanks again.



How many of you are in a bad relationship? A bad marriage? Like it’s seemingly done? At a loss at what to about it? Take heart. Only two options ever existed in the first place: BATES’ LAW states “that in any relationship, one must either change or leave”. It’s that simple. Yes. Very simple. But oh, so hard. Emotions, kids, money, etc. I promise you all that if you make that “hard choice” now, you will be fine later on. I am not promising a quick fix. I would be a fool to do such a thing. What I am saying is be willing to learn to fight alone (see Clubber Lang on Rocky II LOL). It’s in the hard times where you grow.

Life in tha 77316 part 4

It’s been a while. So I am back with some new stuff to tell ya. Recently I was made privy to some stuff about some close friends of mine. One of them, and old Army buddy, is basically Norbit. So much so, he was called out on it by his section sergeant (2012) and was laughed at for it. I got love for dude, but he allows this sheboon in his life to walk all over him. It’s disquieting to say the least. Another friend, who I met along the way out West, is in a bad way. On one hand, he is doing great things in his life. On the other hand, seems as if his personal life is falling apart. Bad times, bad people, bad things happening to a good dude. He feels alone in a lot of things, since he is a newcomer to a major West Coast city. I talk to him a lot. He comes to a consensus that he is going to change his life in a major way. With his work, he isn’t settling for anything. He wants to work multiple jobs. He wants to date again (he is out meeting, greeting people through his work anyway), plus he understands that life is nothing nice. I applaud his courage, because change doesn’t just happen. Besides, he’s too smart to just allow things to happen to him and not challenge/overcome them. His attitude has undergone a facelift, as he talks of personal branding. He’s even talking about writing a book and self-publishing (or getting it on amazon). Seems to me buddy is basically having a second coming-of-age. He is in his early 30s, yet experiencing life as a twentysomething would. I’d say my friend is just finally coming into his own. To hear him tell the tale, he was an outsider of outsiders. With much advice, insight, prayer and relating my story to him, he sees that he wasn’t so bad after all. Just he grew up around a lot of fools in a foolish time.
In closing, I must say I have seen a lot of people like this- amazingly enough, most of these achieve a lot later on in life.


Yes. I am talking about a topic men and women either love to talk about or hate to talk about. People cannot not have a stance on this. For those of you who follow the blog, who know me in real life, etc. knows that I married a White woman, and have two kids by her. I am gonna talk about interracial relationships. Nobody ever gets mad or upset about any combination of WM/ANY WOMAN. I have come to expect that. Now, whenever it comes to Black men (and I expect this too, and it’s not unjustifiable) doing the interracial thing… everybody wants to control him. Why the interest in who a Black man dates (and I don’t mean the cuckold crap), why try to control what a free man does? Interracial relationships are on television all the time, only that 98% does not involve a Black man. Simply put, it tells me that in this regard, that myths, hate and fear still rule.

As for the Black woman (and her many failings), there is a reason why lots of Black men are choosing non-Black women. Black women are PISSED. They don’t like that one bit. In my view, they wanted their cake and to eat it. They want the thugs, pimps, players, etc. and to have the nice guys, the good guys as a “fool on stand-by” so when they are done whoring around, they can saddle that good guy with the emotional baggage, kids and everything else that accumulates from the street life.


There is a huge ongoing debate online that sometimes spills over into real life about this subject. This can go over into a million different directions, but I will not have that today. This is Part One of several I will do.

Remember, people do have options, opinions and all. Don’t try to hate what someone else is doing because you feel some superiority complex.




Earlier this year, I did a story called “How Do You Know Your Worth?”. It was simply my musing on social media memes that “talk a good game” but offer no solutions. Folks always talk about the problem, but never really get down to the task of fixing anything. Like with political people on both sides of the spectrum. Liberals, Conservatives- they all talk but have no solutions (I will get around to talking about THAT on my American Defense Teams blog and repost it here on RnL). The money is not in actual answers. The money is in the pointing fingers, demonizing and destruction of those who are deemed to be “bad” (take Donald Sterling- again, another issue for another time). When I take a look around in our society, I see so much angst, anger and hatred. Yet no solutions. Why? What we been taught over the past six decades by the so-called “brights”, “elites” and all their worshippers/hangers-on that demonstrations, “civil disobedience” is how to affect change. Note that all of that are viewpoints from dictators and despots (how they attained and kept power, mind you). Sociopolitical topics aside, the real point of this article is how does a man or woman determine their worth? It is very simple indeed to determine your worth. The way to do it is:

1) Look at what you are wanting to do in life

2) Look at where you have come from (in my case, I came from the lowest of the low- simply from the bottom)

3) What are you wanting for the future of not only yourself, but for your city, country and for the world?

4) What do you desire in a mate- and what are you not going to tolerate

5) How much value do you put into your time, efforts and ideas/ideology?

6) Who do you listen to as far as life lessons go?

Add all that up (with introspection) and you will have a pretty good idea of what you are, what you want and what your worth is. Sadly today, people do not know their worth. Academia and entertainment has replaced self-worth with groupthink, yearning to belong to a clique, or to be a part of a movement. None of the popular modes of thinking can make up for the lack of self-worth. It’s just not being taught. Social media tends to dumb people down even worse.

Self-worth is just that. The amount of worth and importance you place upon your person, ideas, ideals and everything else that is the intangible part of you. People in this era have either sold out or were brainwashed from childhood to be compliant, malleable sheep who have no backbone, spine or will other than what their masters in the Academia-Entertainment complex tells them to.

Knowing your worth is something that needs revisiting. Knowing your worth is essential in life. The concept of knowing your worth will cut down on most of the relationship ills going on today (SIMPery, women mating and chasing scumbags, etc).

In closing, the reclamation of such things as a spine, intestinal fortitude, will only come with time, experience and struggle. It is part of “the process”. The process of growth, the process of maturation. Knowing your worth is so much more than a social media meme. Knowing your worth is part of a successful life.

How Do You Know Your Worth?


From the poster here, you should all know where I am going with this. People tend to play down to their common denominator. It shouldn’t be that way. The poster says “know your worth”. How do you do that? Simply saying “know your worth” makes about as much difference as telling a homeless man to “get a job” if he doesn’t now what to do, where to go. I remember this in my own life. Basically, men are not taught to value themselves in their own eyes. They are brainwashed into being subservient and DEPENDENT upon the ideals of the media and women. Men, it is time for ALL of us to “get out of the matrix” and realize the con job that has been run on us. Four generations of men raised by women has this nation reeling. It is easy to see. No real men, only a bunch of mannish-acting boys who act like women when angered. This is not the way it’s supposed to be.

But how do you know your worth? Simple. Look at where you are, your current circumstances. Then look at where/what you want to be. Set goals. Refuse to take any crap off anyone. Become the man you want to be, instead of cup-caking, soft-shoeing around people just to curry favor with them. That is how you determine your worth. Looking to anybody else other than yourself and God is foolish at best.

Life and the Pursuit of Dominance

Recently I was privy to a full-on argument… this guy I know and his wife. The guy a vet, cannot find a job, while his wife is constantly berating him, trying to mold HIM into what she wants him to be. So many of these arguments seem to be nothing more than her having a temper tantrum- and he seems to give in, or so he tells us. When I sit down and talk to him, he says all the right things as far as him claiming his manhood back. Over and over again, he gives into his silly, delusional, probably feminist-indoctrinated wife. He does have a child with her… he has done various researching his options (divorce, sole custody of their daughter). He is alone- a lot… his wife doesn’t spend time with him, always walking the dogs, hanging out with friends. The rest of our group have basically given up on him, calling him a loser, a SIMP (Sucker Idolizing Mediocre P*SSY)… they believe he will not do anything. He tells me about all his dreams, his goals and his visions for the future. I have helped him get back on his feet mentally. He almost had a nervous breakdown once, crying uncontrollably. I had to remind him of just who he was. The man is on the edge… at times I wonder just how he is going to make it. I am sure he has some tricks up his sleeve. I encourage him constantly to read, pray and just be himself. He will get through this and be a great dad to his daughter, I’m sure of it.

In any case, I look at him, then I look at my own life. I pose myself this question everyday, and I will pose it to you: What are you doing to make your life one that will be one that is talked about after you are gone?

RELATIONSHIPS and other musings

I was driving down the street the other day after my workout… I got to thinking all the “what ifs”, etc… I got to thinking about women I was involved with… and what life would be like if had married each woman as opposed to my current wife. As some of you know, I like my women curvy… not skinny as a rail… and they have to have a mind of their own. With that being said, I was riding home and was reminiscing of past relationships. I have been a man who never discriminated in his dating choices. I have dated Black, White, Spanish, Asian women. I got to thinking about all of them. Thinking of them, got me to thinking about my evolution as a man. I went from wanting big-breasted, wide-hipped, big butt having sluts to marrying a pretty average young woman (I am 9 years older than my wife). Nothing wrong with average, come to find out, things can be very adventrous (in the bedroom and out). In so many ways, I saw myself growing from a sex-crazed youngster who wanted nothing but big titties in his face and rough sex into a man who loves his family. Realizing that, even though I am 37, it’s humbling. I see quite a few guys my age and older still trying to play the field. Not something I want for my life… I am not judging those guys, just illustrating the differences. My younger brother, who is 35, is still living by the Players’ Code. In my opinion, it is time for him to hang it up and move on to the next chapter of his life. I am not perfect, I just have learned from a lot of the stupid crap I did when I was younger. Thanks for travelling down memory lane with me.